You know…I don’t really have anything against 50 Cent personally. If you can get shot THAT many times and still be walking around there’s a certain level of respect for that. But the man should NOT be making video games. And in case the first pile of steamy crapola that was his first one wasn’t convincing enough for you (After watching Sessler cover it on X-Play, I’m amazed Sessler can still walk upright without throwing up just from the memory of this nightmare.) maybe this’ll convince you.

Nick Chester, in his Destructoid blog, related to us the story of the upcoming 50 Cent video game, 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand.

As to my own opinion, based on what I’ve seen and played so far, I’m looking forward to this about as much as I’d look forward to dental surgery performed by a drunken halfwit. I can’t, however, fault their effort. They put in all sorts of bells and whistles on this sucker–drop in / drop out online play, a co-op element, the Unreal Engine, original 50 Cent music–but they sort of, from what I can tell, missed one thing.

A good game.

And that’s the problem in a nutshell, isn’t it? So many games spend so much time and effort polishing the brass that they forget they’re on the Titanic, and “Nearer My God To Thee” is echoing in the background.

Ah well…maybe the Broken Clock Theory will swing in and save us all at the last minute from yet another cheesy celebrity tie-in game. First time for everything….

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