Killer 7 is a post-modern video game. As Moe Syzlack would say, it’s weird for the sake of weird. But is that a bad thing? Can an indecipherable story make up for bland gameplay? Of course it can!

In Killer 7, you play a man with multiple personalities. But when he changes his attitude, he also changes his body. You start out as a feeble old man in a wheelchair, but in the blink of an eye you can turn into a muscular former wrester or a blind man who sprints down corridors. If you’re feeling adventurous, you can even turn into a woman. Clearly, reality was not consulted during the development of this game.

As far as the plot is concerned, I think it’s about a group (read: one guy who is really seven people) of assassins saving the world from creepy mutants called Heaven Smiles. On a political level, this is about how terrorism is eroding our society. On a spiritual level, it’s God vs Satan. And at the end of the game, you’ll be even more confused than when you started.

Think you understand the ins and outs of one of the most bizarre games ever created? Test your knowledge of Killer 7 here at Kwanzoo.

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