It’s Scarier When It’s Possible–Beijing Olympic Horror Videos
Remember when I put up that piece not too long ago about how the Chinese government was a bunch of cheating bastards who went so far as to cheat themselves completely out of credibility before the Olympics even started? Funny thing…someone took that ball and just RAN with it.
A series of at least four videos has cropped up, available on YouTube (among others), tongue-slightly-in-cheek cautionary tales about the lengths Beijing might well go just to take home that gold medal, mostly revolving around one character, a probable Chinese infantry regular, who regularly executes any Olympian who doesn’t happen to be Chinese.
Comprising archery / shot put, the 100 meter dash, the long jump and ultimately the medals ceremony (which shows you just how many meanings the phrase “masterful execution” can have in Beijing olympics) it’s true that the videos are put on in a humorous fashion, but something keeps nagging at me.
They just might do this.
Okay, sure, it’d be a kind of policical suicide bordering on insanity, but then again, the Beijing Politburo isn’t exactly the poster child for good mental health. These are the same guys who brought you child swapping, faked fireworks and a very good possibility of passport forgery–can you really put the mass execution of Olympians beyond them? Not likely, granted…but possible? Very.
And possibility takes the Olympics from the oldest reality show of all time to a freaking scary horror prospect.
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Kind of misses the mark, I think. China hasn’t been cheating on the games, violently or no. They’ve been laughably insecure about the image they’re projecting and remarkably inept in handling the PR.
Cutting and pasting from another forum:
“Here is the concept free of the magical mysteries of the Orient: Most people don’t like to be embarassed in front of other people, because it calls into question their competence/sincerity/other attribute at issue in the situation. Authoritarian totalitarian dictatorships don’t like to be embarassed in front of other governments, because it calls into question their competence to govern/ability to control. This is particularly bad when there are no formal structures in place for changing the government.”
By the way, the latest bungling: Children of 56 ethnic groups of China actually 56 Han Chinese. This would be like if we had a parade of diversity at the Atlanta games represented by a dozen kids in blackface.
What about the underage gymnasts, Matt?
Gymnasts shmymnists. It’s those Cubans you have to watch out for.
Whoa. Freaky, man. I guess it’s not the Chinese you have to watch out for, just the COMMIES!
REAGAN WUZ RITE!!