And I couldn’t be happier.

Let’s be honest, folks…the theatre as a means for movie distribution is an archaic, outdated, and nightmarishly overpriced system. The monster speaker array and the huge screen are almost replicatable at your own home thanks to rapid advancement in home theatre technology. Not to mention the sheer hubris involved with the continually inflating prices…but now, things are only getting worse for the theatre.

Popcorn prices are on the rise.

Dig the word from the studio briefing:

The increasing use of corn to produce ethanol for cars has sent prices of the staple soaring — not only in the supermarket, but also at the concessions counters at theaters. The AMC theater chain increased the price of its popcorn 25 cents last weekend. Larry Etter, chairman of the National Association of Concessionaires, told ABC News Tuesday that theaters are also having to deal with higher paper pulp prices, which boosts the costs of the paper bags and tubs for the popcorn as well as the cups for sodas. Moreover, higher fuel prices drive up delivery costs. The price rise at the concessions counter comes at a time when many theaters are also raising ticket prices — in some cities to more than $10 each. Since the beginning of the year, the average ticket price has risen 3 percent — on top of last year’s 5 percent rise.

AMC’s jacking up popcorn prices. Soda prices. Ticket prices. Is there no end in sight?

Yes there is… and it’s called the video store. It’s called Netflix. It’s called video on demand. More importantly, it’s called take your overpriced candy and sodas and snacks and seat rental fees, AMC, roll them up real tight, and cram them. The time is coming, o my readership, when you will receive all the very latest movies in the comfort of your own home without intervention from the multiplex. No longer will you be held to the tyranny of some second-rate theatre manager who says, oh, YOU can’t see the After Dark Horrorfest! WE don’t think it’ll make US ENOUGH MONEY!!

My middle finger is raised in full triumph in the general direction of AMC, and if you stand in front of it, you can feel the heat coming off the channel of righteous indignation that I’m channeling in their direction. Get stuffed, boys–the time of the home theatre is on the RISE!

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Categories: Movie stories //