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Okay, okay.  Got to breathe…got to calm down.  Calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean…happy place….HAPPY PLLAAAACE….

I can’t DO it any more!  This is TOO GOOD!  Seriously, THIS IS TOO GOOD! Man, I’m punching caps unrestrainedly here–this is beyond belief!  By now you’re probably all wondering what’s got my proverbial knickers in the equally proverbial twist, and I’ll be more than happy to fill you in.

See, a few months back, a great thing happened.  We got our first George Romero zombie movie in years that had no connections to some big-bucks studio who was going to screw it up with more executive meddling than the entire Fox network.  It was given somewhat of a mixed reception, with people either loving it (like myself) or hating it (like brain-damaged troglodytes and Zac Snyder).  Okay, I’m just kidding on that last one, but still.  It’s great news to a chunk of the audience of the last one that shooting on Diary of the Dead 2 will begin in September, and a synopsis is available.  Check it out: [Read more →]

Tags: entertainment, trivia, recreation

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If I had no soul, I would open this article with something like “they say you can’t judge a book by its cover…” But I won’t do that to you. It’s just sick and wrong. You deserve better.

I’m here to talk about the world’s worst DVD covers. While digging through discount bins at local media stores, we’ve all encountered some really bad designs; yellow text on a pale background, for example, or typos on the back cover that nobody bothered to fix. Crappy pictures that were cut out of their natural environments and set to “glow” in Photoshop. All that stuff.

The scope of this article will be limited to examples that I can find online. I swear I once saw an awesome cover to Halloween III: Season of the Witch in the “lightly used” rack at Blockbuster, and it had the most ridiculous back cover ever made. Like someone had literally just typed up what they could remember from the movie, misspellings and all, then printed it out and shoved it in the back cover. Except it had screen captures and studio logos and an orange background, so it was the for-real cover…it was just terrible. 12-pt Arial terrible. But I can’t find it, so you’ll just have to trust me.

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Tags: life, web, recreation

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Tags: Movie stories by Liz N.
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Seriously. I would love it–LOVE it–if some enterprising horror buff judge out there could put up a restraining order keeping Zack Snyder from going within fifty feet of a zombie movie. After the hash he made out of the Dawn of the Dead remake, it’d definitely be worth it. Especially since his NON-zombie fare like Sin City and 300 went so well. Well, about as well as can be expected, anyway, but still, wildly better than his zombie movies.

Which is why I started seething the second I heard about Army of the Dead.

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No, seriously! It’s TRUE! I can scarcely believe it myself, and if I were actually looking to go to Pennsylvania any time soon I’d swing by just for the sheer coolness factor involved here. You see, the mall where they shot Dawn of the Dead–the original, not that second-rate suck-farm that was the remake–is an actual mall. It’s called the Monroeville Mall, and it’s located in Monroeville, Pennsylvania.

It’s said that many of the original features–like wall displays, and of course the fountain–can still be found in full operational condition in the Monroeville Mall, and this lends a special and very unique opportunity to see a piece of horror film history first-hand. Which is why it makes especial sense to note that the HorrorHound Weekend crew will be putting on the first-ever showing of Dawn of the Dead at the Monroeville Mall.

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This news is somewhat weird, but for Romero fans, it will absolutely blow your mind. I realize the headline somewhat gives it all away, but let me run it down for you.

Way back in the long-long-ago that was the 1980s, George Romero released what horror buffs thought would be his last zombie film, Day of the Dead. Though no one HOPED it would be his last, and indeed, it was not to be, it was still his last zombie movie for around about two decades. And in Day of the Dead, Romero introduced the “character” of Bub. Bub was a zombie that was being trained for domestication, and– far be it from me to spoiler!–it did NOT end well.

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You know, I’m downright baffled by this next piece of news. I’ve found a lot of places that are exporting horror titles, trying to get in on the grand gold rush that the direct to video horror industry has been since roughly 2002. And in that search, the atlas has grown steadily—Malaysia, Brazil, Chile…plenty of others. But this one just might take the cake.

Pakistan.

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Okay, I don’t live in California, but I kind of wish I did thanks to the news about American Zombie, a psuedo-documentary coming out on the order of fairly soon.

American Zombie follows four zombies–a convenience store clerk who longs for a career in publishing (and if you’re a convenience store clerk, you long for just about any other career), a florist trying desperately to reclaim lost memory, a hopeless romantic trying to accept her true nature as a flesh-eater (probably hard to get boyfriends when you’re contemplating the smell of their brains) and a political activist for “zombie rights”, kind of like the ones briefly glimpsed in Shaun of the Dead.

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It’s clearer than ever that the zombie film has a whole new—unlife?—to it these days. Between all the various direct-to-video and indie installments and the dramatic and downright unnerving resurgence of the Grand Old Man of zombie cinema, George Romero himself, the zombie horror subclass is moving like Friday night in the morgue.

But gaining in popularity—this is the second such title I can remember hearing of lately—is the concept of shooting a zombie movie from the zombie’s perspective. This time around, it’s called Zombies Anonymous. With Zombie Apocalypse at the door and a war between the recently dead and the otherwise just getting fired up, a young lady named Angela just got killed by her insane ex-boyfriend. Now she’s dead…for a little while, until she comes back as a zombie. Now forced to straddle the line between the life she remembers and the unlife she currently inhabits, she’s going to have to get things figured out…and fast.

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So the word is out about the Day of the Dead remake, and we’re all looking at it with something like trepidation. We’ve been here before, and we did not like what we saw. Anyone familiar with a little Zack Snyder travesty called Dawn of the Dead? Yeah, I figured you’d remember that one—you can put the torches and pitchforks down. It was just for illustrative purposes.

But anyway—the bar for Day of the Dead to not completely suck is surprisingly low, thanks to Zack Snyder’s complete ignorance about how a George Romero zombie movie is supposed to operate (They don’t run, moron! Have you ever seen them run? No. No, you have not.). The word, however, is that Day of the Dead will not be all bad. Most early reviews suggest that it will be flawed but not without charm, and at least mediocre. Which, given the way things have gone for Romero remakes—Night is king and Dawn is crap—actually makes some kind of horrible sense.

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When I heard that Night of the Living Dead, that great horror classic, had slipped into the realm of public domain I confessed to mixed emotions. I do believe in the right of an artist to hold his copyright for life…but at the same time, there’s something clean, and downright noble, about arguably the greatest horror movie of the 1900s going public domain.

If it can’t be in George Romero’s hands…then it’s well that it should go into OUR hands.

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