T.V.’s Most Famous Season Cliffhangers (Part One)
On May 29th, the second and third parts of the highly anticipated Season Four finale for Lost will air as a two-hour special, bringing conclusion to the May 15th beginning. Are you excited? I know I am!
No, I’m not. I really can’t fake this. I’ve never seen Lost.
There, it’s out in the open now. I understand almost nothing about the show, and I have a feeling that watching it wouldn’t shed much light on the subject. It sounds dark, mysterious, and confusing. As a former English major, I appreciate the fact that they named a character on a deserted island John Locke. I really do. But I just can’t bring myself to take the plunge.
Yes, I’ve felt left out. I’ve felt it ever since people first started speculating that the island was purgatory, and I even caught a few clips here and there. The actor who plays Hurley was an interesting and funny guest on my favorite radio show. But none of this has compelled me to watch. I think I can explain why.
There will never be any payoff.
I can see it coming. The writers have already hinted that the series finale will raise more questions than it answers, and I just don’t have the stomach for that. All that anticipation, all that theorizing…for nothing. Some people seem to enjoy the letdown - the commiseration with other disappointed fans is almost part of the experience. But I don’t like that, and I never will.
May 29th will be no different. And in honor of this great tradition of screwing around with the fans, I’d like to present a brief history of television’s most famous cliffhangers.
The Simpsons
Who Shot Mr. Burns?
In its sixth season finale, The Simpsons parodied Dallas’ famous cliffhanger “Who Shot J.R.?” (to be discussed in Part Two of this article). It was Mr. Burns’ uncontrollable megalomania that nearly killed him, as it turns out - which would have been a great cop-out answer to the question raised in the episode’s title. But unlike Dallas, The Simpsons actually picked up the hunt for Mr. Burns’ would-be killer in the following season.
The Office
Casino Night
Everyone ships Jim/Pam (or “Jam”). Don’t they? I mean, you could certainly dig into the netherworlds of the internet and find people who don’t approve of Jam as a couple, but that’s obviously just a freak occurance brought about by radiation or over-fluoridated water or something. Jim and Pam are obviously meant to be together. They’re the perfect couple. But in the second season of The Office, with Pam engaged to her pig fiancé, it seems all hope is gone for Jam. But not so fast! The season ends with the two sharing a passionate kiss, and the hopes of millions of fans are ignited again…only to lay dormant for a whole year, waiting for the fallout.
The West Wing
What Kind of Day Has It Been?
To say much about this cliffhanger would spoil it, because there’s absolutely no better line of dialogue to whet the appetite than: “Who’s been hit?! Who’s been hit?!”
But, of course, I’ve forgotten to mention the most famous, life-changing, and utterly stunning cliffhanger of all. It’s called -
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I also vote for Happy Days, which not only gave us the phrase “Jumped the Shark” but is also the the only cliffhanger you could solve with an idiot’s grasp of trajectory.